-26.3-

Disclaimer:
I am tired, running low on sleep, and it's dark out so these issues may very well be "night thoughts" and possibly are out of porportion to what I usually think during the daytime and at happier times.
Three minor issues:
1. Can I have hobbies?
I was a little bothered by this during the song writing workshop. I know that I'm not as serious about songwriting as my peers, and I don't intend to write songs for a living, so I feel like someone else who really cares should be in my spot. That I'm not...worthy enough to be with the serious people. That I'm out of my league. And yet...I want to be there and learn, too, but using chords and chord progressions is hard and it makes me think that I'm not cut out for song writing, but then I remember how accomplished I feel when I finish a song, and how I like the feeling of my brain turning off as I write a song, almost like when I'm drawing or painting.
2. Does everything have to be original?
Sometimes I want to play around. To not turn everything I do into an artistic statement, or something "of my own"- to not feel pressured  to make a great work and compete with others. To just do what I want. But sometimes I don't quite know what I want to do with Art.
3. Art funding vs. Science funding
This is from part of an episode of the show "Slings and Arrows" (which I love and I'll talk about in a later blog post.)
In one of the episodes, the financial director of a theatre company has to get funding for the production. He goes to the Minister of Culture, who grudgingly allots some funding. The Minister makes it a point that the funding for the production was the cost of one MRI machine, which could have been used to identify many terminal diseases in early, preventable, stages.
Ever since that episode, I was troubled by this. One must have bread, but also roses, I know this. However, I have a cousin who needs financial medical assistance, and I know that she's struggling to wait for a new wheelchair because hers is partly broken and a repair is too costly. It makes me uneasy to think that some of the money in the government that goes towards art programs prevents people in need, like my cousin, from getting much needed assistance. I know that funding art is important, I was angry when STAC got all of its funding cut (why can't they put some money from sports towards us!), but thinking about this issue brought feelings of conflict to the surface.